


I'm sorry, I didn't mean it

by Awenna



Series: Ineffable Husbands Week 2019 [5]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Angst and Feels, Ineffable Husbands Week 2019, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-07
Updated: 2019-09-07
Packaged: 2020-10-12 03:22:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20557397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Awenna/pseuds/Awenna
Summary: Crowley is tired and says things he instantly regrets. Luckily for him, Aziraphale knows him well and is always ready to help.





	I'm sorry, I didn't mean it

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, I am a day late because I had a migraine yesterday so no writing and no laptop for me yesterday. I had no idea what to write until I started to listen to AnnenMayKantereit because I like them and you should totally go and check them out. :D  
Today's (or rather yesterday's) prompt was "Battle, Fight, Argue"  
Also sorry not sorry for the slight angst today.  
Also this is taking place before the Apocawasn't, but don't ask me when. Les voies du Seigneur sont impénétrables as we say.  
Also I suck at tags, please help me.  
Enjoy!

** • Part 1: Crowley ** **•**

Satan, he had been stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. How could that have happened? He did not even mean it. It did not even matter. He had been tired after a long day doing low level temptations. He had been a bit more lax recently and Hell had come knocking on his door (or rather interrupted the latest play of “I Want to Break Free” to tell him how he needed “to tempt more people and more effectively because they had been looking for once and thought he was not currently doing enough of a job”). Well he had gone and done that. And then he had had a meeting with Aziraphale. They were meeting at the bookshop that day. It had started rather well Crowley thought. They had tried a very good bottle of wine that he had found while tempting a rich CEO in the City. They had had some pastries, most of which Aziraphale had eaten.

Yes, but then he had been a bit more drunk that he had aimed to be. And because he did not eat, it had been a bit more effective at making him drunk. And sure, he was a demon, but their bodies were still somewhat humans to an extent. And well, his words had been further than his thoughts. He had not meant what he had said about Aziraphale being so afraid that he would not take any risks and that he was a coward. Of course, Aziraphale was afraid. Crowley was terrified. Their balance was so fragile and could collapse at any moment. And if there was a coward their relationship, it was him, not Aziraphale. Why had he said all those things? He had seen Aziraphale’s looks after he had said those words. Shock. Bewilderment. He had not waited to see the rest and had just fled. How could he be forgiven after saying those things? Their Arrangement would be finished and there was nothing he could do, and it was all his fault…

Crowley found himself in a small park with a bench. He sat and miracled himself a bottle of strong alcohol to stop the thoughts and the hurt.

** • Part 2: Aziraphale ** **•**

What had just happened? The evening had started well. Crowley had brought a bottle of very good wine with him. He had not said where he had got it, only that he had borrowed it from someone who would not mind. Aziraphale had sighed and brought two glasses. Crowley had seemed tired, but nothing too different from many other evenings they had spent together over the centuries. He had even eaten a couple of those French pastries that Aziraphale had bought. He had chosen religieuses which he thought was a very clever and funny choice, as well as a very tasty one. They had been talking about what had happened since their last meeting, how they were, had joked a bit. That is until…until Crowley had started saying those things about how he, Aziraphale, was too afraid to take any risks and act and how he was a coward.

Aziraphale had been surprised, but apparently not as much as Crowley who had appeared shocked by his own words and left, almost running out of the bookshop. Aziraphale had stayed flabbergasted for a few instants, not quite knowing what had happened or what he was supposed to do. He shook his head as a dog would after being in water and sobered up. He then composed himself enough to think about what would come next and stood.

He started walking towards the door Crowley had just left from. He switched off the lights and locked the doors. Once in the street, he looked from left to right, hoping to see Crowley who had left only a few seconds earlier.

There, at the end of the street, turning right.

Aziraphale started to walk-run so as not to lose him. Crowley was walking very fast and seemed completely lost in his thoughts, not knowing where he was going. Aziraphale wanted to call at him, but he was not sure that Crowley would hear him in his state. The demon turned into a small park and sat on a bench. Aziraphale reduced his speed and stopped for an instant before entering the park. The demon had miracled a bottle of spirit and was about to start drinking it. Aziraphale started moving again, sat next to Crowley and put a hand above the hand holding the bottle. “I would not do that if I were you.”

** • Part 3: Together ** **•**

Crowley almost jerked back against the bench at the touch. “What-?”

Aziraphale softly pushed down Crowley’s wrist until the bottle was resting on bench. Then Aziraphale clicked his fingers and the bottle disappeared.

“Would you mind sobering up a little?” asked Aziraphale.

Crowley shook his head while tears were streaming down. “Please?” he added.

“Okye~” said Crowley and slowly sobered up. He looked away from Aziraphale, as if he were trying to both hide his tears and was too ashamed to look at him. After a couple of minutes, the angel put his hand on the demon’s shoulder: “Would you mind telling me what just happened?”

“Oh angel, I am so ssssorry,” his voice was tearing up. “I didn’t mean any of it. I had a very long day. And everything has been so much and you were the easiest and only person except myself I had available and I am so sorry. I didn’t mean any of it. Well not to you. I was saying to you what I know is true for me. I am so tired. And I am so sorry.”

“Shhhh,” said Aziraphale softly, slowly massaging Crowley’s shoulder. “It’ll be fine, you’ll be fine. It happens. I am only sorry that you had to keep it bottled for so long that it exploded like that.” He paused. “And for what it matters, I think you are very courageous and there is nothing wrong with being afraid of those stronger than you as long as you do not let it overpower you and continue to have hope.” He said all of this while looking at Crowley’s face.

The demon dried his tears with his hands and took a deep breath. “I am sorry.”

“It’s fine, you will be fine, we will be fine. Do you want to sleep on the couch at the bookshop tonight? I don’t think you are in a state to go home.”

Crowley seemed to pause for a second to consider the offer. He nodded.

“Good, good. Lovely. Let’s go then. No need to wake up the neighbours.” They stood up and hand in hand walked back to the bookshop.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, so I cannot write them directly arguing because it is awful and I don't like it so have the aftermath. Also I hc that the following morning they have a longer discussion on what happened the previous day. Maybe I'll write it someday. Not now though because it's 1:24am and I have to wake up at 9:30am tomorrow (today?) morning because it's Sunday i.e. mass. Anyway TMI. I hope you liked this. As always comment and come and talk to me at @dontbesoevil.


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